Horror Film Utilizes Recording Studio (From Lucian)

Ship of Fooles and Aurora Productions have released a soundtrack to the upcoming Nightmare 3: The Final Nightmare. The songs have a certain, literal bent to them. You can tell what the film is about from the titles alone.

"Nightmare" - Tuesday Knight
"Don't Be Afraid of Your Dreams" - Go West
"Are You Ready for Freddy" - The Fat Boys
"Dream On" - Aerosmith
"Dream Warriors" - Dokken
"All I Have to Do Is Dream" - The Everly Brothers

Is this truly the last film in Dartcher's series? It will feature Jodie Foster in the lead role. Crispin Glover returns as Freddy and Clive Owen is back as well. Owen's TS just keeps going up. Will this film make the grade? Emma Watson returns as well, but she's relegated to supporting status outside of the top 4.

Nightmare 3 opens August 12th.

Director Acts Out Scene From Duchovny Porn Collection, Gets Angry at Crowd for Making Unauthorized Videos of Presentation

During a recent press conference held at the Miracle Pictures Studio lot, director JJ Abrams discussed how odd it was working on the set of The X-Files: Take No Prisoners.

"It was a weird, wild ride" Abrams commented. "Working on the adaptation of the iconic TV series was a dream. Mystery, drama, some special effects. Really fun stuff. But working with Pedro? Man, that was a trip."

According to a source from the production, Baseball Mogul Productions chief Pedro would often visit the shooting with his entourage of trained pets in tow. On one particular day, according to the insider, Pedro had taught two large ducks to play table tennis. While actors David Duchovny and Gillian Anderson attempted to deliver serious lines, the birds would be playing on the table adjacent to the set, quacking with each point scored.

"It was very distracting" Abrams stated. "But that was just a minor problem compared to one of Pedro's chimpanzees. It... he?... kept moving lights. When asked to remove the animal from the set, Pedro would just reply 'Cha, JJ. Cha.'"

The filming of the new X-Files film did complete, however, after a year-long wait from Miracle Pictures.

"It's the first of a series of X-Files movies," a studio representative explained. "With the first film the standards are all there. Mulder, Scully, an investigation into something strange. It takes place after the conclusion of the series. The next film centers on a new agent. A new X-Files world will gradually be introduced. We're all very excited to have the options on these projects."

The X-Files: Take No Prisoners opens on August 26.

My Mom's Dog Doesn't Fart, But It Sure Pees a Lot. If He Were a Knight of the Round Table, He'd Be Sir Peesalot. Werd.

10K Cases producer Bryan Bishop is on a roll with two new films hitting HTG theatres this month. Sepulveda and Fart Dogs: An Until 5 Adventure are scheduled to finish off July. What's next for the Best Producer winner?

This news source sent a reporter to check on future movies from 10K Cases at their office, located just behind the billboard marketing Magi After Shave. Our investigator was able to make several pages of notes, but unfortunately dropped them once he returned to the Happ offices. But, thanks to some logic and finger crossing, we have put together a pretty good guess on what's next for 10K Cases.

With the success of Pedro's dog Amy in HTG Hollywood, Bishop is hoping to get the same success for his own dog, Laserbomb. A series of Laserbomb features will have the dog and movie owner, the father from Everybody Hates Chris, solve crimes and save various damsels in distress.

"That makes perfect sense" commented Bob, a longtime reporter for Happening. "I'm sure he'll throw in a nice soundtrack and an appearance by some hot actress. I'll make sure to give it a 9."

Sepulveda opens next week, with Fart Dogs being released the week after.

It Was 104 Here Today. 104! Good Thing I Wore My Cotton Pajamas, Huh?

In the land of make believe, a death doesn't negate the appearance in a film. Such is the case with Leslie Nielsen, who passed away last year at the age of 84. Thanks to the use of CGI (a special award), the comic actor will be included in Baseball Mogul's upcoming The Film Protectors 3.

"I tried to write it without him," BM honcho Pedro stated, "but it just didn't work without him."

Starring Sarah Michelle Gellar and Pedro fav Parker Posey, the target this time is director Uwe Boll. Opening day is set for July 29.

And, bad news for Carrot Top fans... He will not be returning for this installment.

"He died in the first one," Pedro explained, "so, no."

A Third Film? Who's Going to Protect US?

Actor John Cho was reportedly tasered by police last night after becoming belligerent when asked to turn down the music at his Independence Day party.

Cho, who has appeared in movies like My Name is Bob and comedy leader Cruisified, allegedly scuffled with cops and was thrown to the ground and tasered. At one point, officers are said to have placed Cho in handcuffs.

He was never arrested, according to a source at the HTG Police Department, which reports that Cho was “very shaken up” by the incident.

Cho next appears in AmyLand Studios' comedy The Film Protectors 3 on July 29.

I Tried to Put a Putting on the Ritz Video Here, But It Didn't Save Correctly. Sorry.

Teufel of Decepticon Liberation Front has dumped a nice wad of cash... $150 million... to add an animation studio to his production office. The studio allows the production of an animated film for a third of the normal cost, but just once a month. The attractiveness of the feature is boosted because it can be leased to others (spending the once-a-month use).

Teufel could not be reached as of this writing for the reason of the buy, but an eager movie fan seemed to have the answer.

"He's going to be making more of those robot shows" the movie buff explained. "With a new animation studio, he can branch out into other cartoon franchises. I hear My Little Pony is still up for grabs. Maybe something like that. A Rainbow Brite crossover would be a natural."

Producers wishing to lease the animation studio are encouraged to meet with Teufel at his favorite hangout, the toy store at Mega Mall.*


*Waiting for confirmation.

Isn't That the Old Guy From the Park Who Wanted to Give Me Some Candy?

After a hiatus from delivering prizes for buzz voting, the HTG admins have caught up with the overdue honors. A random buzz voter is chosen each week to win an issue of HTG Buzz. The fictional magazine is categorized with the comic books in town, making their storage in comic boxes possible.

After winning Issues 1 through 3 of HTG Buzz, Toran has won a special prize (yet to be chosen). Starting over, Lucian himself gained a prize after winning Issues 4 through 6. The Ship of Fooles operator decided to take home a really really big rooster. A unique item, Lucian will discover what the rooster's purpose is when used in the release of an HTG film.

Currently draws are being made for Issues 1 though 6. Some buzz voters already have a head start on possibly winning the next grand prize. Will it be you? Buzz vote each week and it could be!