Apparently No Batboy Stories. Pity. Batboy Sells Papers. And No Frozen Yogurt? Sheesh!

A new HTG news source has opened. WordPunch! is the project operated by Toran and Blueothello. According to Blue, "We get shit done and it's always the truth."

Is this true? Check out WordPunch! through our links. Good luck to the two residents on their new endeavor.

Actor Nabs Role as NYC Mayor, Celebrates with Rain Dance at HTG Coliseum (TCW Event #2 There Now!)

The HTG Police Force will be losing one of their officers, James Brolin, who works under the name "Lt. Kincaid." He will be leaving the team to star as the Mayor of New York in the upcoming Lake Hope Features/Safron Productions crime saga "Close."

Close is about a group of New York City detectives who investigate the murder of Sarah Janeson, the secretary and assistant to the Mayor of New York. The body is found in the mayor's office, and all fingers are pointed at the Mayor. The detectives soon find out who the real murderer is.

Close is set for a Friday, August 27th release. Brolin co-stars with Don Cheadle, Jeremy Piven, Topher Grace and Ryan Phillipe. This film marks James Brolin's first HTG performance since Eat Shit and Die.

Syndi Buzz Begins

A new set of syndicated HTG television shows are on their way. Buzz voting has begun for a variety of series. Instructions on how to vote can be found here, along with the eligible shows. Make sure to get your vote in before September 1st.

Batman Casting Begun?

With the operators of Flip Brothers Studio occupied with personal business in the coming weeks, will Batman scribe Bryan Bishop field a Caped Crusader movie to his own liking, without their input?

Recent rumors have it that Bishop is looking for an actor to portray Bats villain Mr. Freeze. Will he choose the route of previously used Arnold Schwarzenegger? Word from the studio or Bishop has not been given, but we expect more in coming weeks.

I Bet That Bow Tie is a Clip On

With the new network television session scheduled for a September start, net chiefs and producers are scrambling to get products ready for broadcast. This is true for Miracle Pictures Productions, responsible for the writing and creative behind Devil Ray Television's returning hit It's Always Me.

"I've known for some time what we're going to do this season" Marlowe remarked during a recent lunch at Carne Diem. "I'm scrambling to get some actual writing started, though. I'd like to get a couple episodes done before we start. I tend to write as the season progresses, gauging the responses of viewers that I speak with. After everything that happened in season four, we've got to pour it on for season five. I think everyone will be happy."

A rumor has surfaced that Marlowe has employed Pee Wee Herman himself, Paul Reubens, to guest in an episode or two. When asked if this was true, and if the man-child would portray an Autospouse client or worker, Marlowe did not say.

"I'm not a big fan of spilling too many beans" he managed to answer with a grin.

It's Always Me will begin its fifth season this September on DRTV.

Sellevision Actor Wants to Work With Producer and Pauly

Jeff Goldblum is leaving Law & Order: Criminal Intent after two seasons, according to entertainment sources. His option with the show had expired. The original explanation from Goldblum’s rep was that the actor is departing due to the uncertainty around the long-running drama’s future. But a new reason has come to the surface.

"I really want to work with Pedro and Baseball Mogul Productions again" the actor stated this evening. "Working on Sellevision was great. And I hear that Pedro is doing some more Roads Masterson movies. I want in! The bad news is that I won't be able to work with my good friend Pauly Shore, who's going to be absent from the films. The good news is that there's going to be another movie, The Jizzmopper Chronicles, with Pauly returning as the Jizzmopper. Oh! I'd really really like to be a part of that."

Sellevision is currently in theatres. The next Roads Masterson film, (name removed by EIC), and The Jizzmopper Chronicles are in pre-production.

She May Not Know Wrestling, But She Sure Understands Hair Extensions

With the new surge of activity at the HTG Coliseum, one talent is more pleased than others.

"It's like Christmas already, y'all!" exclaimed Britney Spears after a recent visit to her favorite coffee shop. "You know them TCW shows? I'm the ring announcer! So for every one of them TCW shows, I get to work and get money!"

Ship of Fooles' Lucian Carter has enthusiastically marked dates at the city's largest venue for a series of TCW wrestling performances. Merchandise such as posters and HTG-rays help with the costs of the productions.

"I hope he keeps doin' them shows!" concluded an excited Spears. "These iced coffees aren't cheap, you know!"

The HTG Coliseum is currently featuring the Miss Globe 2010 Beauty Pageant, overseen by Romeitaliano and sponsored by CzarTim's Happy Funtime.

Studio Expands Lot, Gives Opportunity for Joke About Bishop

Some argue that Lake Hope Features is the most active studio in HTG Hollywood. Grabbing film projects faster than Bishop grabs chicken at a KFC buffet, LHF has acquired a respectable film library.

This weekend LHF set plans in motion to increase the number of movies in its vault with the purchase of a new stage for its lot. Studio chief Quantum made quick plans for the new stage.

"We're going to produce Close on it" the eager executive stated in HTG Chat. "We're really excited about it.'

Close is the new project by Safron. Directed by Oliver Stone and starring Don Cheadle, the plot follows New York City detectives as the investigate the murder of the Mayor's assistant... with initial evidence pointing at the city leader.

Close is scheduled for release on August 20.