Journalistic Dry Spell Ends With Poster Tease

Canine Actress Has Ruff Week

Little One, featured in the recent Amyland Studios outing Dog Party, was involved in another car accident earlier this week. On Wednesday, her brand new F-150 reportedly sustained thousands of dollars in damage when another driver swerved into Little One's lane and struck her vehicle. The young star has had more than her share of trouble on the road.

Earlier this year, Little One got into a three-car accident when she crashed her Volkswagon bug into the back of another auto. In April, she was pulled over for speeding. And in July, Little One was accused of throwing half-eated Milk Bone dog biscuits out of her window, striking another car and causing it to crash into a tree.

"I think she's too young too drive" commented famed dog entertainer Amy.

"What do you expect?" asked Little One. "I'm just a tiny dog and I have no thumbs!"

Little One and Amy will return to the big screen in Baseball Mogul's The Color of Amy, coming soon.

Shirt and Shoes? Not Required. Teeth? Don't Be Puttin' on Airs!

Newcomers Chester and Lester Bestertester may be new to HTG Hollywood, but they have already parlayed their experiences into a motion picture.

"We're mighty fortunate" explained the brother with the suspenders.

"That's true" added the brother with the do-it-yourself dental work. "We walked into lots of offices and they'd just yell at us."

"He's right" continued the first man. "They'd say 'Hey, we're a copy shop!' and 'Get lost, we sell coffee, not movies!'"

According to the two immigrants from the country's center, it took a few weeks before they managed to sell their idea.

"It's about life back home and all that. You know, workin' on the farm. Fetchin' water down at the crick. Taking your cousin to the dance. Typical growin' up stuff."

Although a release date has not been set for Hills: Ozarks, they're hoping that the releases of the Mountains films helps their cause.

"You hear a lot of them fellas sayin' Ozark Mountains. But we just say hills. That's why we called our movie what we did. That and we didn't want to hog in on any rights with them there Mountains fellas. The last thing we need is another feud."

Readers are asked to keep an eye on HTG Hollywood news for further details on this new film.

Was That a Mushroom That He Bumped Into?

Calls flooded the HTG Police Department after something... actually, two things... were spotted in traffic near downtown HTG Hollywood earlier this week.

Was it an advertising scheme for a new film? A couple guys just having fun? Or is this how two brothers actually travel to work?

"We're not sure" answered a puzzled Carl Winslow, the Chief of Police. "We've been unable to locate these two, despite all of the technology available to us. Driving go carts on a busy street is obviously dangerous. Hopefully that was a one time thing and we won't be seeing them again."

Rumors have been crossing the city over the last couple months that Chief Winslow might be retiring from his post. With the success of Another Time to Die Hard and more Die Hard films on the way, will he be picking up more acting roles?

"I have no reason to retire from my duties with the city" Winslow remarked. "And these silly rumors that I'll be replaced by Deputy Barney Fife are absurd. He's passed away, folks. Not going to happen. Let's nip this in the bud while we can."

City officials are asking that any knowledge or sitings of the go cart drivers be forwarded to the HTG Police Department.

Film Draws Parallel With Studio Plans

It's rare to find animals who can act. But when filmmakers find some, they steal the show. When they're the majority of the show? The movie's priceless.

After a successful opening of Dog Party, Baseball Mogul Productions is working on The Color of Amy... a film with mostly dogs. Based on the Paul Newman/Tom Cruise movie The Color of Money, there are basic similarities.

"In The Color of Money, an aging pool hustler played by Newman discovers a way to stay in the game... by mentoring a young hustler portrayed by Cruise," stated a representative of BM. "In The Color of Amy, the older Amy will be tutoring the younger Little One. There will be some twists to the tale, though, so watch out."

It has not been offered if Amyland Pictures Parker Posey will return as Amy or if Elle Fanning will voice Little One, as they did in Dog Party.

"There's a parallel to the film and our future with Amy" the rep commented. "Amy is looking at hanging up her collar and hanging out in some sandbox in HTG Malibu. So it's time that a new entertainer comes along to take over. We're thinking that Little One will do nicely."

The Color of Money is slated for September. Woof.

Barbed Wire Removed from Restaurant After Accident Involving Barbequed Bologna

Parker Posey rocked a Mos Eisley Cantina T-shirt as she arrived at the HTG Airport in HTG Malibu from her annual trek to the Lego and Eggo Conference in Bumfrack, Arkansas. The actress managed to answer some questions about her recent voice role in Baseball Mogul's Dog Party.

“It’s personal, emotional" Posey stated. "I was apprehensive jumping on board for another turn as Amy the Dog, but in retrospect, it was the best decision of my life. That and not ordering the fish on the flight. These roles as Amy have afforded me a lot of creative opportunities outside of the dog franchise and it’s given me a lot of opportunities to learn and grow as a performer. And as a person, it’s endless, really.”

Dog Party, released by Amyland Studios, is currently in theatres. Next for Amyland is The Dependables, concerning a groups of older canines in adult diapers who must combat drug runners who have taken over their kennel. Posey is rumored to return as the voice of Amy.

Actress/Model Annoyed at Rumors

Kate Upton may seem to lead a charmed, happy life, but she faces daily turmoil because of false rumors about her. This especially holds true concerning her love life.

"One week they have me in Vegas partying with Harmer," explains Upton. "The next week I'm in Tahiti swimming nude with Amy the Dog. Then the next, they have me eating tacos in Cabo with the ghost of Don Knotts. What will it be next week? Who knows. But you can figure that it's likely not true."

Kate will appear on the HTG Hollywood big screen in the upcoming Poop: The Worst of the Litter. Although a small part, the role has already brought considerable buzz to the flick.

"I'm in just one scene" she mentions. "And it's in bed, so the wardrobe is, you know, non-existent. But some creep got ahold of some dailies and published a couple pics of me looking like I'm not wearing anything. The nerve! Why do people do things like that? I don't post naked pictures of them on Instragram. Of my dog Smoochie, maybe. But some perv? No way!"

The Miracle Pictures film Poop: The Worst of the Litter is the fourth in the Poop series.

"Marlowe has more serious offerings that he's working on," says a rep from the studio. "But he's not finished with them. He didn't want to miss out on some of that sweet Guardians of the Galaxy money. So he threw up this film that he's had done since spring. He tweaked it a little, to keep it contemporary. Hopefully he'll have his other films ready soon."

The Poop movie mostly follows a pair of friends and a day in Arkansas.

"It's obviously not to be taken seriously" the rep continues. "There are some familiar gags in there. Some not-so. You'll see."

Kate Upton and Poop: The Worst of the Litter can be seen starting August 1.